The Challenge – Being Assertive

The Challenge:

This challenge is a request from a member of The Mindset Game.  Assertive people are those that have the self-esteem to communicate their ideals with confidence. Issues caused by not being assertive most commonly arise at work but can also be an issue with family or friends. For this challenge, define one of your ideals that you feel strongly about. If someone is infringing on this ideal, find the courage to express your feelings without losing your temper.

This task is worth 50-points on your scorecards.

Thought Provoking Questions:

Did you find it difficult to maintain your composure?

Did you think through your wording before delivering them to others?

The Lesson:

When you find yourself being infringed upon it can be difficult because most people would rather sacrifice their own feelings than create a potential conflict. This can even mean you tolerant certain levels of cruelty rather than sticking up for yourself. The ultimate result of this continued stifling of emotion is usually a loss of temper. That is why it is important to address these concerns early and in an assertive manner.

So what is an assertive manner? It is standing up for your rights without going on the attack. It clearly informs others where you stand on an issue and it means communicating in a style that is not passive or aggressive but somewhat in the middle. The only way to know you are being assertive is based on how others respond. If they respond favorably to your request, it is likely a sign that you have succeeded. Keep in mind that it will take time to find your style of assertiveness, and often times it changes slightly depending on the recipient.

“The basic difference between being assertive and being aggressive is how our words and behavior affect the rights and well being of others.” – Sharon Anthony Bower